Tuesday, January 01, 2008

Fuck Frumkeit

Let it just go fly A faraway kite to never never land.
Happy New Year.
So I think the perfect theme for 2008 or at least part of the proverbial perfect theme is "fuck frumkeit",and its fun to say too !
I would also like to take this opportunity,to start the beginning of a fresh, focused and frumkeit free new year with a thank you note. This thank you note goes out in particular to all the. condescending,haughty meanspirited,innately insecure and utterly fake frummies that have somehow descended their way into my life over the years for whatever reasons.All of you in particular have been my inspiration for this unique "fuck frumkeit" theme.I couldn't have learnt what I did without you pious saints gone screwy.

The sincerely sneaky saintly screwballs were quite the lesson conveyers.The smooth jazz lessons of misplaced piety is the gift that keeps on teaching.
I want to especially thank a particular pious screwball who taught me all I need to know about corrupt frumkeit and the saint like traits of sincerely frum screwballs. I couldn't have shaped my perspectives without you. And for this I am ever grateful.

Its a shame most of you probally won't ever even read this note of sincere hakaros hatov.

"fuck frumkeit"is the new spiritual reawakening.

May the new year be the kind of year you want it to be.


Anonymous said...

As for f-ing frumkeit you are dreaming. Frumkeit is shomer negiah, to say nothing of getting to first base or any base thereafter...

Ry said...

Ah, that's beside the point. I learned in school the ones who talk about it the most do it the least.

DK said...

What happened?

Jaded Topaz said...

Anonymous,lol, its a. figuretive fucking so no actual negia worries, religious ? mate !
If you are who I think you are I miss the good old days of laughing hard over mundane matters. Hope all is running smoothly and well paneled

Ry, lol well I'm pretty certain we didn't attend the same schools! So we might have learned different things about different concepts. Though fucking in general was not a topic generally tackled.
But I do appreciate your astoundingly astute take on the matter. But did want to point out the non applicability at this time and post.
Fuck is my new favorite word of month. It just fits so perfectly into many different themes at the same time.and makes things feel better too. And feeling good is what life is all about, I'm sure you learnt this in your advanced philosophy

DK, just a cumalative conglomeration of coincidences and conclusions. And the fact that I have to deal with one particularly especially sneaky frummy often doesn't fix things.I just can't keep up with the sneakiness. I'm sneaky disabled I don't understand how sneakiness works until its too late.so I end up getting screwed or used or fuguretively fucked when I don't expect it. And the iggeres haramban prayer that I do every morning just doesn't cover this particular individual. He's an important part of a certain part of my life and he's just a sneaky screwball. This among other sneaky screwy frum individuals that have stepped on me and into my life over the years. There have been way too many. So I thought it was time for a message of hakoros hatov.

Anonymous said...

Yes I think I am who you think I am, but then again who am I, I often ask myself.

And who is doing the asking?

These types of conundrums are why I love Alice so much. Truly, the rabbit hole goes unimaginably deep.

As for your colorful metaphor, if one wanted to one could understand it as a deep, subconscious, psychological Freudian slip to attain profound, carnal knowledge of the aforementioned object.

Which raises the gnawing question -- among admittedly other gnawing questions -- how this usage of this cultural metaphor came about and what it says about the culture. In other words, why does the culture equate something that implies the desire to hurt, harm or damage another person, place or thing with an act that otherwise implies the desire to share pleasure, offer happiness and achieve the deepest union with said person, place or thing?

A conundrum...

Anonymous said...

And, yes, the panels are still smooth. Which leads to the questions about panels in your life....

DK said...


Ronald Coleman said...

Panels? I was on a panel once! It was the International Trademark Association annual meeting. Crazy bunch of miners, believe you me!

Well... I guess you had to be there.

Rhymin' Shimon said...

A man once wore a charcoal suit
A hat of darkest black
Yet it pricked his conscience not
To throw crystals off the track
He would weave her and deceive her
Gaily flirting, then withdraw
Not fargining jaded loopholes
That the girl collecter saw
And then this phony faker
This ebony-clad fraud
Waited for a sneaky chance --
The tzaddik was abroad!
Then he stamped the crystals out
Into tiny shards and dust
And he laughed and stuck his hat on
And took home the frummy bus
But while walking home from shul
On that fateful fickle night
Some sparkling challah flour flew
Out from a window, flakey white
It cascaded 'cross the city
Covered Broadway, east to Park
Then it floated on to Jersey
Like a dusty yoshon spark
And it landed on a thousand dented
Borsalino lids
And some Stetsons and a Roche
On some beaver-covered Yids --
And in Boro Park and Flatbush
And in Lakewood; Monsey too
Out in crusty old Passaic
And the Five Town through and through
All those up-hats, and the down-hats
All that ebony-dark felt --
All were coated with that flour
Brushes couldn't get it out
And the steamers and the blocking
Only made it stick like grout.
All the broken-hearted black hats
Now were sprinkled flour'y white
But of all the hats in all the towns
Not a one could match the sight
Of that sneaky, sniveling, long-limbed creep
Who had trod that jaded jewel
Who had worked so hard to make her seem
A vapid silly fool
But when Jaded tossed the challah dough
Like the ash that Moses threw
No black head had turned quite so white
As on this phony heartless Yeed
Who went home and brushed and scraped and rinsed
But could not get out that white
Like a plague from ancient times that fell
On one who won't do right.
And twas Jaded who baked up that spell
And cursed his dark chapeau
And now she sits and sips a drink
And forgets her curs-ed foe.

Anonymous said...


As a frum woman, I am saddened at your overarching fuck-you attitude towards me and other frum people. I am the first to say that though I am frum, I have definite conflicts in addition to wishing the good L-rd handed out a few do-whatever-the-hell-you-want days. I try not to let frumkeit overwhelm or ever uber define me. I too am incredibly annoyed at the Brooklyn/Monsey/lakewood fafrumte modality many NY's choose to live in.

With this said, I just want to tell you that I would never, ever box up non-observants people, saying fuck-you, you are not religious, you are bad, etc. I do not judge people. I know lives are complex and the only one who knows the shoes we walk in are G-d. I also love diversity in humanity. I do not put you down, so please don't put me down. It is not nice, and certainly not fair.

I am sorry that you have been hurt by what sounds like some pathological poeple who are frum, but let me tell you we are not all like those people. I refuse to perpetuate the hatred you are encouraging.

I enjoy your blog, the colors, your brilliant use of language, and your emotional depth.

Please do not make me regret my time here.


Jaded Topaz said...


I'm not sure what you're asking me to stop perpetuating.
"Frumkeit" has fucked me over too many times.So fuck frumkeit is what i'm going to use as the title for the post and theme for 2008.
This is not about a specific people. Its about the frumkeit that certain people have hidden behind when fucking around with me.And for this I will always be saddened or gladdened depends on what mood i'm in.
This has nothing to do with frum pious women like you who are earnestly ? trying to spread cheer and goodwill.
Its just that i've been bitten too many times.
There is a limit to how many times you can overlook stuff in life before never looking back.
I'm actually thanking all those that have fucked around with me.
reverse hakoros hatov thing goin on.
I would never want anyone regretting their stopover here!
uhm and I do hope you enjoy your stay! without getting offended in the process.